I'm A Hockey Dad

The top (AA) team’s tryouts have concluded. And so, tomorrow night I begin the unenviable task of selecting a team of my own. I anticipate having to whittle a starting group of 50+ players down to 17 over three skates encompassing a combined period of 2 1/2 hours - hardly seems like enough time, but it is what it is.  I need to build a team of deserving athletes who I feel I and my to-be-chosen staff will be able to work with and develop both individually and as a team over a six-plus month hockey season.

I know already this will not be an easy or enjoyable task, particularly when it comes to deciding the final few players who will no doubt only differ by the slimmest of margins in my gut. I will rely heavily on the combined observations and opinions of six people I trust to help me make informed and objective decisions. I’ve chosen six unaffiliated evaluators to ensure bias is eliminated from the selections. I will also leverage the copious notes I obtained through attending the previous team’s whittling process as many of those players will filter down to my tryouts. But no matter which way I slice it, emotion will come into play - the players’ and mine. Some feelings will be hurt. I know, because as a hockey dad, I’ve been on the other side many times.  I’ve felt my kid was “unjustly” cut from a team from an undoubtedly biased perspective.  I’ve stood next to my kid as they received their news; felt their dejection.  I may have to release a player or two that I know personally.  In fact, after five plus years of the Devil playing hockey in this town, it’s pretty much a certainty.

Someone asked me the other day if I’m nervous yet. I replied “If I’m not nervous, it doesn’t matter enough to me” which has generally been my approach going into presentations at work.  So I’ll spend the next week resisting the urge to re-adopt my nail biting habit.  I will no doubt have a couple of sleepless nights. In the end, we all know it’s just a game; we all get that someone has to be chosen and someone else will be released, but that doesn’t make it any easier - on either of us.  Other coaches I’ve talked to say this is the worst week of the year and I guess I’m about to find out.  I just hope I’m able to make fair cuts that leave minimal scars. 

#imahockeycoach and #imahockeydad

The hockey dad life ebbs and flows like the ocean. We’re in a small ebb now, but a killer wave is rising in the near distance. You go from spending an inordinate amount of time in rinks watching your two kids and their teams play here, there and everywhere to having time to scrub the deck, scrape the barnacles and watch The Masters. Don’t get me wrong; the break is welcomed.  I’m sure the Boy and Devil, who put in way more physical, if not psychological, effort than we do, will concur. They no doubt become a little weary of their lengthy time at sea.

The end of the kids’ hockey seasons actually coincides nicely with the start of the NHL hockey playoffs and the Major League Baseball season.  I’m a self-admitted big sports fan.  Hell, I’ll even watch darts or billiards in a pinch. But its never quite the same as watching your own. Rooting for them. Urging them on.  Reveling in their wins. Agonizing over their losses. The legions of hockey parents who, like us, usher their kids to rinks across the nation no doubt get the same rush from participating in the game.

In a couple of weeks, I get to begin participating at yet another level as a head coach - Captain of me own ship if you will. My rooting, urging, reveling, agonizing will have to be tempered with delegating, mentoring, leading - coaching. I will have a group of players, coaches, parents looking to me for guidance - measuring my ability to affect team and individual successes - the criteria for which will differ with nearly every player and parent.

As a new coach/pirate, I will unashamedly beg, borrow and steal ideas, insights and techniques from sea-farers and salty dogs I’ve worked with in the past or those who wish to provide assistance as the season progresses. I’ve already begun compiling a library of evaluation forms, drills, season plans, preliminary schedules and budget documents - all necessary tools in running a tight ship.

Beyond the selection of the team, which deserves a full examination of its own, one of my first priorities will be identifying my support group of manager, assistant coaches, trainers and others. The emphasis will most certainly be on teamwork.  I will rely on these crew members to help steer the ship - keep it on a somewhat even keel. Opinions will be welcomed and measured. Suggestions will be applied within the context of a course we’ve charted for the season.  We will surely encounter our share of unsettled waters as all ships inevitably do.  The full measure of a crew is one who works hard through to a see journey’s successful end.

I guess this has all been a prelude to saying I’m nearly ready to set sail on my maiden voyage.  All aboard who’s comin’ aboard!

#imahockeydad